Xm

Yesterday was the day the result came out for our first clinical year. Before the day came, we had to wait for 3 days( which in reality is longer than that). The theory papers had finished 2 weeks before The next 2 weeks were for our clinical exams (3 session)

The clinical exams

Which I had done poorly,

GS: “owh, you’re going to fail, man” These words I would never forget, be it an act of psychology or just plainly scolding me. That what made me burst…..as I went into the quarantine room. I thought to myself “ I shouldn’t be like this” “stop it, stop it”, the lecturer were there,

thank god I was among of the earliest, the emotion dried away, and more importantly I managed to escape the mva cases (o_0). The short case was a big helped I guess for my score(hmm..)

GM: “ok, this patient has a renal problem, what more would you ask?” I started with “owh….ahh……” why did it have to be renal which I didn’t revise at all for this exams (tend to go for target subjects only) even though I would know it (supposedly) I went blank nevertheless tried to answer stutteringly.

a result made from wardrounds started about 2 month ago.

The day: Alhamdulillah, I manage to make it. I passed all 12 subjects. All praise be to Him.

For someone who had failed 5 subject before, I am very grateful.

All that I could think of was what my friend had said to me “ it was all up to our prayers if we were ever to make it”

to my friends, don't be sad, we will always be there to support you and pray for you. i'm ready to help you guys.

thoughts

When my eyes couldn’t shut tight

My heart keeps on racing

When I do close my eyes

Flashes of light keeps popping out of nowhere

My eyes is in a REM state

By I’m not sleeping

My heart keeps on racing

What is it that made me hook up

My heart felt as if it would burst

My brain felt small and getting smaller

As if it is being crush

What is this thoughts~

free Weekends

What do I do in times like this?

The results still hasn’t come out yet.

Without any pressure, without any urge,

The books still dusting away in their racks.

I’m in a desperate effort to finish my only one novel

Still half way through it,

But still a long way to go.

The 14 inch screen’s reaching out to me,

It manipulated me to still clinging on.

After window to window,

From picture to picture.

Just an excuse to do my assignment,

Which never seem to find its end.

i'm still waiting though,

2 weeks to go

And they’ll be here.

Fear and anxious

I don’t know why? But this feeling keeps on coming.

Ever since holiday started, I always feel unease,

I know things will turn up this way,

Always in fear,

Knowing that it will burst and explode,

I couldn’t stand it any longer,

Tears would break out in my mind,

Somehow I manage to suppress it.

Feeling sorry for myself and others,

Why does the thought of resentment always,

Come knocking into my head.

Sadness comes whispering into my ears,

Never in my life I count the days when,

The most waited week to end so fast,

I’ve plan everything I wanted to do

When I’m alone…

Yes I’m selfish, very.

Thinking of only me,

But I’ve never fail to think,

Of their happiness,

And always be anxious.

Early Clinic

Whenever we had to start clinic,

head start twirling, my whole body is unease

All that I could think is to get away from all of this

That day may come to me with ease.

But the period would never be decided to fall.

Courage and endurance keeps drifting back and forth

Still seeking the passion to keep holding on.

Kerunsingan

Tika ini saat paling runsing

Rintangan dan dugaan datang

Bergilir-gilir tidak pernah lekang

mengharap jauh sinar mendatang

Tika ini saat paling runsing

Bila mana ketenangan hilang

Resah gelisah terus tertanam

Rumit sudah kesudahan

Tika ini saat paling runsing

Fikiranku kuat bertekad

Masa akan mengubah

Hanya sabar mendidik perasaan

pulau Kapas Class Educational Trip =)

i know this is quite late

but i really didn't have the mood to post it until now.

all i want to say is that is was really exciting, fun, mesmerizing, most importantly i would never forget this experience with you guys my friend. the first ever class trip held by ourselves to an island which most of us didn't really got a chance to go before.

*Clapping to ourselves!